Saturday, January 14, 2017

From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose eBook Release

 New Harbor Press, January 2017

It's here. You can download my eBook for only $7.99.

On November 4th, 1977 at the age of 16 my life changed forever. In August of 1977 I met a man who was 10 year older than me. He was into drugs and got me hooked. My mother was an alcoholic and did not care what I did, so I moved in with this guy, got hooked on drugs, and got pregnant. Part of my story is blurry, but I remember somehow I wound up back with my mom who lost custody of me and I was forced into a group home and was forced to have an abortion at 9 weeks pregnant. This book is not about my abortion, but how God took me out of ashes into beauty. It's about women who are struggling with guilt after an abortion. it's about women who are struggling within themselves with any type of pain or grief of the past.


Every day of every second a woman has an abortion. Every day of every second a woman has to live with the emotional turmoil of her decision. Forty years ago at the age of sixteen Debra had an abortion changing her forever. 

From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose brings an emotionally charred women out of the pits of fire, through the ashes into the beauty of purpose. With the direction of God, hurting women weather through the painful journeys, become women of spiritual beauty, find God's purpose, and learn to live again.

My hope is this book will help other hurting women who have struggled or are struggling with grief or anger of post-abortion.

You can purchase a copy at the following websites. 

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

A New Devotional in the Works

Many of you know my story. Just after Mothers Day 2013 I lost by youngest daughter to an AIDS related illness. What most of you do not know is that I struggled to get out of the darkness after her death. I felt hopeless and dead. It took me several years to get past my torment. I have shared my story in several anthologies, but I also wanted to create a devotional for other grieving parents.

Dancing through the Storms 365 Day Devotional: Surviving the Loss of a Child takes you on a daily journey of healing and hope.

The book should be released in March or April.

Here is a sample:


There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 NIV

Time is supposed to heal all wounds. When you lose a child, time stands still. It cannot be turned back or erased. The wounds of pain cannot heal. When I lost my daughter on Memorial Day 2013, it was my worst nightmare. I wanted to hide away from the world, I even contemplated suicide. My baby girl was gone. My wounds of pain cut too deep to heal. I was broken. It is in the brokenness of loss, that the Lord wants us to renew our souls and hearts.

January brings change and new beginnings. We have thirty-one days of time to be born with renewed hope, time to plant restored faith, time to heal old wounds, time to build new attitudes, time to laugh again, time to dance in the rain, time to scatter the stones of anger, time to embrace loss, time to search within our soul, time to throw away our sorrow, time to mend our hurt, time to speak with love, time to love ourselves, and a time for peace.

During the month of January, take time to renew your soul and heal your heart. Each devotional this month guides you through a spiritual renewal to find peace and heal the wounds of losing your child. Take time to meditate on the words and let the Lord be your strength and solace.

Lord, my wounds of pain cut my soul and heart into tiny shards that cannot heal. Give me strength to renew my soul and heal my heart. With your guidance Lord, I will get through the pain and let time heal my wounds of losing my child. Amen.

My prayer for you, as it is with me; is that the Lord heals your broken soul and revives your hurting heart.



Sunday, July 10, 2016

Exciting News! 'From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose' soon will become a reality.

It has taken me forty years to write or even talk about my abortion. November 4th is a date that is forever etched into my soul. When I sat down and started blogging about my abortion and how the Lord took my broken spirit and brought me out of the ashes of pity into the beauty of purpose, I had no idea my words would go beyond my blog.

Six years later, those blog posts are now a 60, 000 word, twenty-three chapter book that will soon become a reality . I am overwhelmed that the Lord chose me to share my words and His word with other broken women.

"From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose' blurb:
Every day of every second a woman has an abortion. Forty years ago at the age of sixteen I had an abortion which changed my life forever. Every day of every second a woman has to live with the emotional turmoil of her decision.
From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose brings an emotionally charred women out of the pits of fire, through the ashes into the beauty of purpose. With the direction of God, hurting women can get through the painful journeys, become women of spiritual beauty, find God's purpose, and learn to live again.

Although my book 'From Ashes of Pity into Beauty of Purpose was written to help post abortion women, it is also was written to help the hurting woman, heal the broken woman, and harbor the lost woman. it was written to help the woman who is consumed with pity find the beauty of purpose.

Look for updates in the coming months.

Thursday, June 30, 2016

'Out of Darkness into Daylight' is going to be published in Grief Diaries: Poetry & Prose and More

More exciting news to share. Another story I wrote about my daughter Michelle 'Out of Darkness into Daylight' is going to be published in Grief Diaries: Poetry & Prose and More to be released December 1st. I will post more details as I am updated.

Friday, June 17, 2016

The Art of People Book Review

Disclosure: "I received this book for free from Blogging for Books for this review."

Have you ever wondered how to get everything you want? I know I do! With Dave Kerpen's book The Art of People you have access to 53 easy to use tips that provide a plan of action for you to get everything you want.

Learning people skills isn't easy to master, but Dave shows you the what and how  of everything you need to get everything you need.

If you are struggling with people skills or just want a refresher course, pick up your copy.

You can find more about the book on the Art of People website. Take a quiz, buy the book, visit the blog.

Saturday, April 2, 2016

Book Review: I Like Giving by Brad Formsma

Disclosure: "I received this book for free from Blogging for Books for this review."

Brad Formsma intends to change your attitude in I Like Giving. Most people grumble or moan when they have to give and have an attitude of greed instead of generosity. 

When you choose to live a generous life you start to change and so does the world around you. Something incredible happens when giving becomes our idea and not out of a duty or obligation. When you move from awareness to action, miracles happen. As you make giving a lifestyle, you'll realize you're not only loving life more, you're also creating a more generous world - a better world for all of us.

This book opened my eyes to how giving back is so important to not only myself, but the person on the receiving end. 

I Like Giving is more than just a book about giving, it is a book about how we all should live! Filled with many wonderful and uplifting stories of giving, by the end of the book, you will stop grumbling and like giving with an open mind and heart.

To learn more about the book or purchase a copy to inspire yourself and other's check out these websites:

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Blog tour: ‘A Thankful Heart’ and Review

Disclosure: I received a copy of the book from Cedar Fort in exchange for a review. However, all opinions are my own

Have you ever been down a road and got lost? Most of us have and sometimes that is how life is. We start traveling down an unknown path and lose our way when we have no directions. David A. Christensen's book A Thankful Heart: 31 Teachings to Recognize Blessings in Your Life gives the right directions to stay on track and not lose your way. Life is not easy and we all get lost along the way, but when we have the right directions, life is much easier to navigate.  A Thankful Heart: 31 Teachings to Recognize Blessings in Your Life is filled with 31 ways to get you back on the right path. Christensen ends each mini lesson with a self-examination for greater gratitude, scriptures, and a parting thought. The book gives you an opportunity to examine your life and where you are going. 

If you feel you are lost and cannot find your way back, pick up a copy of David A. Christensen's book A Thankful Heart: 31 Teachings to Recognize Blessings in Your Life and change your life in 31 days.

About the author:
David A. Christensen has taught missionary preparation and Book of Mormon classes for over thirty years. His testimony and enthusiasm for the restored gospel was shared with missionaries and members in the Chile Santiago North Mission where he served as president, and again in Central America when he was president of the Guatemala Missionary Training Center. He counts his children and grandchildren as his most important converts, and his best friend and wife, Deena Bond Christensen, his eternal companion. David Christensen's website is: You can also find him on Facebook and Instagram @david.a.christensen. 

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Growing Your Marriage from the Ground Up-

Marriage is not something to enter into without serious consideration. A marriage needs to be cultivated and tendered from the ground up if you want it to last a lifetime. A marriage needs a strong foundation built on love and respect. These two elements will not only help your marriage grow, but provide a lasting foundation.

Start with Love-
The seeds to a lasting and strong marriage start with love. If love is not the roots of your marriage, then the foundation on which it is built can disintegrate. Marriages should not be built on mutual attraction alone, but four love “seeds” that will insure a strong, healthy beginning and an everlasting foundation.
  • Listen: Listening is one of the most difficult communication skills in a marriage. Everyone wants to talk, but not everyone wants to listen. A strong marriage has to be built on a strong foundation and without the ability to listen to your spouse, your marriage will fail. In a marriage, there are two people with emotionally charged feelings and usually one person always thinks they are right. In a healthy marriage built on love, both of you cannot be right, but that does not mean you cannot voice an opinion. However, the key to voicing your opinion is listening to what your spouse has to say. If you do not listen, then communication fails and if communication fails, the marriage fails. To grow your marriage from the ground up with love, put on your listening ears. Don't just hear what you spouse says, but listen to what your spouse is trying to communicate. If you learn to really listen, then you plant the seeds of love.
  • Overcome: Overcoming obstacles throughout your marriage will be a challenge, but for your marriage to keep a strong foundation built with the seeds of love, you have to try to get past any obstacles that puts your marriage at risk. A lot of marriages are at risk because of the foundation, but yours does not have to be one of them. When a problem arises, handle then, not later. If you let s problem simmer, then your marriage will start to crumble. You must learn to overcome obstacles instead of sweeping them under the proverbial rug. The challenge is tough, but with patience, practice, and persistence, any obstacle your marriage faces can be overcome. If you learn to overcome obstacles, then love will grow into something lasting.
  • Value: For a marriage to be built on a strong foundation, you must value your spouses opinion as well as your spouse. When you discard or disrespect your spouse, you are not showing love. Love is what begins your marriage and when you value your spouse, the foundation of your marriage grows strong. To grow your marriage from the ground up with love, value your spouse. Don't treat your spouse with dishonor or disrespect, but value what your spouse has to say and most importantly, for there to be a strong foundation, value your spouse. Show your spouse how much you love them by valuing them as a person not as an object. If you learn to value your spouse, then the seeds of love will grow.
  • Encourage: The last seed of love is encouragement. Encouraging your spouse everyday not only builds them up, but helps you grow in the marriage. Little things you say or do matter when your spouse is discouraged. You don't have to buy a dozen roses or cook a fancy dinner, just be there when things go wrong or your spouse is having a bad day. Marriage is all about encouragement. Encouragement helps keep the foundation strong and healthy. All your spouse wants is a kind word or a loving gesture when they feel stressed out or hurt. If you learn to encourage your spouse, then the seeds of love your planted will continue to flourish.
Finish with Respect-
When you plant the seeds of love at the start of your marriage, then you have to finish with respect. If there is no respect in your marriage, then there is no love. Marriages must include these seven respect “seeds” in order to continue to flourish and survive.
  • Realize: In a marriage, you have to realize that there are two people. A marriage cannot be one-sided. When you grow your foundation in love, you realize it isn't just you anymore. The things you did before you got married should not be part of the marriage. You have to realize for a marriage to survive, old habits have to die. Old habits are like weeds that grow between the cracks of a strong foundation, they will destroy it. Realizing if you want your marriage to grow, old habits have to go will help your marriage flourish and survive. If you don't realize old habits will suffocate your marriage, then there is no respect. When a marriage has no seeds of respect, then it is built on lies. Plant the seeds of respect by realizing it takes effort to make your marriage grow.
  • Equip: A marriage has to be equipped with the right tools to help it grow in respect. If you are not equipped to handle to small stuff, then you cannot handle the bigger problems. Growing a marriage from the ground up takes more than just the right “seeds”, it takes the right tools. There are three tools every marriage needs to help it grow: patience, time, and cooperation. When a marriage is brand new, patience is a much needed tool to help till the soil. If your are impatient with your spouse, feelings get hurt and marriages suffer. Sometimes it may be difficult to have patience, but this tool will help grow your marriage into a strong foundation that will last. The best way to use patience to to start with the little things. Little things don't matter in a marriage if you use patience to be understanding. Once you master the little things, patience will come easy when bigger problems arise. Use patience as a tool to help build the foundation of respect in your marriage, not destroy it.
  • Sacrifice: In all marriages there must be sacrifice. It is not easy to give up something, but you must in order for your marriage to survive. When you get married, you give up being single. This is a huge sacrifice because you are used to having or doing things your way. However, you made a sacrifice to be committed to another person. In your marriage, you sacrifice a part of yourself daily, whether it is working to take care of your family or taking care of a sick spouse. Regardless of what you had before, you have to make sacrifices to grow respect in your marriage.
  • Patience: Patience is one the most important respect “seeds” of marriage. If you don't have patience,then you don't have a strong foundation. In a marriage you cannot be quick to judge or quick to anger. Be patience and love will grow. Listen to your spouse before judging their actions. It is easier to get angry than be understanding. If you practice patience, then you can turn anger away. Look into the heart of your spouse before judging their actions. If you look deep into the heart of your spouse, you will find love. The love you have for your spouse will help your patience grow. Learn from your spouse before judging their actions. If your spouse practices patience, then you can too. Patience is how you earn respect and give respect. It is what makes your marriage strong.
  • Trust: When trust is missing from your marriage so is respect. A marriage has to be built on mutual trust. If one person does not trust the other, then the marriage cannot grow and flourish. Trust is not easy to gain, but it must be earned. Always be open and honest with your spouse. Never lie or disrespect your spouse. Trust does not have to be planted and forgotten. If you want trust, give trust. If you want respect, give respect. Trusting your spouse is how your marriage will grow from the ground up. It takes trust to build a strong foundation filled with respect.
  • Communicate: Communication is another important “seed” of respect in a marriage. If there is no open communication, then there is no respect. If there is no respect, then there cannot be a strong foundation. Listen to your spouse, not just hear. Talk to your spouse, not just speak. Be there for your spouse, not just pretend. Listening, talking, and being there are important “seeds' of communication which will help grow respect and a strong foundation for the marriage.
  • Enjoy: Enjoy everyday together. This helps continue to build the foundation of your marriage. It also helps build respect for each other. If you spend time enjoying each others company, you discover new things about your spouse. Take the time to ask about their day. Take a walk together. It does not matter what you do, but how you do it. Make an effort to enjoy each other so you can respect each other.
Love and respect will help grow your marriage from the ground up, but it takes the “seeds” and “tools” to help it flourish. A strong marriage has to have love where you listen to each other, overcome obstacles, value each other, and encourage one another everyday. A growing marriage has to have respect where you realize there is more than one person in the marriage, be equipped with the right tools to help your marriage grow, make sacrifices, practice patience daily, enjoy each others company, communicate by listening, talking, and being there, and trusting each other no matter the circumstance

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Overcome Fear of Failure

Most people fear a plethora of things, but one fear will stop all people from doing anything. The fear of failure will paralyze you to the point of never trying something new or even taking a chance. When you fear failure, you also fear life and cannot grow. There are several ways to overcome fear of failure which not only will help you conquer your fear, but help you accomplish your goals.
Fear Can Be A Roadblock
Fear may only be a four-letter word, but it is one of the most cumbersome, emotional roadblocks you can face. Getting around fear is not easy, but with the right tools, you can conquer your fear of failure.
  • Face your fear of failure failure head-on. Three things happen to your body when you know you are going to face a new challenge or take a chance, your palms sweat, your stomach knots, and your heart races. Facing the fear of failure head-on gives you the power to overcome any obstacle in your way. You cannot stop these feelings, but you can face the unknown head-on by going around the roadblock with three things.

  1. Persistence: You have to stay strong and be persistent in facing your fear of failure. Getting past the roadblock of fear will not be easy. When you stay on course and move forward, the roadblock will disappear. Keep steady going forward, push fear of failure out of your way, and you can accept failure.
  2. Determination:The roadblock of fear of failure will get in your way everyday if you let it. You have to be determined to go around the things that stand in your way of success. Determine to not let your fear of failure take over your life. Be steadfast and keep going down the road regardless of roadblocks.
  3. Willpower:Fear of failure can make you weak. The roadblock in your path will continue to grow if you do not have willpower. Do not let fear stop you.Stay strong.
Failure Is a Part of Acceptance
Nobody likes to fail, but failure is part of life and personal growth.
  • Accept that you are going to fail. When you accept failure, you control your fear of failure. Accepting failure gives you the strength to move past your fears. Acceptance of failure is not an easy task when fear of failure weighs you down knock it over with the right tools.
  1. Be willing to fail: If you are not willing to fail, then you cannot be willing to accept failure as part of your life. You have to let yourself fail to get past your fear of failure. Nobody wants to fail, but failure is part of personal growth. Be willing to fail so you can grow in success.
  2. Acknowledge failure: In order to accept failure, you need to acknowledge failure. You have to admit, you are going to fail, but it is okay to fail. Do not let your fear of failure stop you from admitting failure. Let failure be an option in your personal growth journey.
  3. Take risks: Everyday you take risks when you walk out the door or get in a vehicle, but how many times do you risk failure? If you take a risk and let yourself fail, the fear of failure cannot control your life. Go out, take a risk, and let yourself fail.
Overcome Fear By Isolating Failure
Fear of failure can make you bitter and lonely. When you are afraid to try new ideas or take chances, you isolate yourself from being happy.
  • You have to isolate your fear of failure. You have to isolate your fear of failure not yourself from enjoyment. You have to want joy, peace, and happiness, but if you are afraid to take chances, then all you have is sorrow. Isolating your fear of failure gives you opportunities.
  1. Control your thoughts: Negativity has a way of working on the mind. If you want to overcome your fear of failure, you have to learn to control your thoughts. From the time you go to bed to the time you wake up, control what goes into your mind. Remember, it is okay to fail, but you do not have to dwell on the negativity. Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts of success. If you control what goes into your mind, you control what comes out.
  2. Stop making excuses: We all have made excuses to why we fail or why we are afraid to try something, but you have to stop making excuses or you will never try anything. Isolating your fear of failure means you have to stop making excuses for your life. Failure is growth and if you want to grow, don't have excuses why you can't, have reasons why you can.
  3. Tie up loose ends: Overcoming your fear of failure is a long process that takes time and effort. Isolating your fear of failure means tying up loose ends. When there is something you did not finish because if fear of failure, make an effort to finish. If you stopped yourself from trying something new, make the time to try it. You have to tie up loose ends before you can isolate your fears.
Let Go of Failure
You have to let go of your fear of failure. Letting go of something is never easy, but letting go of fear of failure will set you free.
  • Fear of failure can take hold of your life and strangle your personal growth. When you let go of something that is strangling your life, you can move freely without worry or regret. Letting go of your fear of failure gives you the freedom to succeed without defeat.
  1. Let go and make mistakes: Mistakes are going to happen and are a part of life. Let go of your fears and make mistakes. Making mistakes is how you learn to get over your fear of failure. Mistakes are how you learn to let go of failure.
  2. Let go and learn from mistakes: We all make mistakes, it is how we grow. However, if you don't let go of your mistakes and learn, then fear of failure will be with you constantly. Don't keep making the same mistakes, let go of failure, and learn to grow.
  3. Let go and grow: Give yourself room to grow by making mistakes, failing, and learning from your failures. When you give yourself room to grow, you give yourself room to not only grow, but soar.

The keys to overcoming fear of failure are not a magic formula that will happen in one day. Personal growth takes time and effort, but you have to be willing to change by using the right tools.

Monday, August 17, 2015

The Journey of Self-Growth

The journey of self-growth is not an easy path. There will be doubts and fears along the way. However, there are ways you can accomplish self-growth and get past the doubts and fears. Along the path of self-growth, you have to conquer six doubts and fears:self-healing, self-forgiveness, self-value, self-respect, self-confidence, and self-contentment.
The first hurdle you must get past on the road to self-growth is self-healing. You cannot grow in strength if your soul is weak. Life is filled with unseen scars from the past and the self-healing process can be a challenge. Self-healing takes time and one of the best ways to begin the process is through journaling. When you write your thoughts and feeling down on paper, you erase the scars of the past. Releasing all the hurt and anger of the past builds strength to move forward on the self-healing journey. Your soul and the path to self-growth will become stronger once you learn to let go and heal.
When you find the strength to heal from the past, the next hurdle on the journey to self-growth is self-forgiveness. You cannot grow in empathy if your heart is empty. Self-forgiveness is one of the most difficult hurdles you will face during your journey of self-growth. It is never easy to forgive oneself, but in order to grow, you must forgive yourself. One step toward the self-forgiveness process is to create a personal mantra. When you tell yourself you are forgiven, you break the stone surrounding your heart. Filling your heart with love creates empathy to move forward on the self-forgiveness journey. Your heart and the path to self-growth will become empathetic once you learn to open up and forgive.
The third hurdle on the journey to self-growth is self-value. You cannot grow in worth if your spirit feels useless. Self-value is something that is often overlooked during the journey to self-growth. Feeling useless and worthless can make you feel less valuable and you may have gotten to the point where you do not care about crossing the hurdle of self-value. The best way to get over feeling worthless or useless is to challenge yourself everyday to do something for someone else. When you do something nice for someone else, your spirit no longer feels worthless or useless. Encompassing your spirit with goodwill creates a sense of worth and usefulness so you can move forward on the self-value journey. Your spirit and the path to self-growth will become worthy and useful once you learn to help yourself by helping others.
Another difficult hurdle to cross on the journey to self-growth is self-respect. You cannot grow in love if your mind is suffering. Self-respect is two-fold during your journey of self-growth. When your mind is suffering , you are unable to love yourself. When you cannot love yourself, you cannot find mercy and peace. To find mercy and peace, you have to clear your mind with meditation. When you clear your mind and let in peaceful thoughts, you find mercy. Clearing your mind with meditation creates peace and mercy so you can move forward on the self-respect journey. Your mind and the path to self-growth will become peaceful and merciful once you learn to let peace into your thoughts.
Self-confidence is a hurdle we all have faced on the journey to self-growth. You cannot grow in power if your body feels tired. Having self-confidence in how you look or feel helps to boost your journey of self-growth. When your body feels tired, you look at your outer self and not inner beauty. Remember, beauty is not skin deep, it comes from deep within. Loving your body without criticism, creates your inner beauty so you can go forward on the self-confidence journey. Your body and the path to self-growth will become beautiful once you learn learn to accept you are a beautiful person inside and out.
The last hurdle you need to get past is self-contentment. You cannot grow in joy if your being feels lost. Self-contentment is the final hurdle you have to cross, but if you have no joy, you have no life. When your being is lost, you cannot throw away the past. The past will stand in your way of self-contentment. Although you cannot erase your past, you can throw it away and never look back. Embracing your being in the moment will help you to forget the past so you can go forward on the self-contentment journey. Your being and the path to self-growth will forget the past once you learn to never look back.